Monday, July 21, 2008

Interesting and Irritable Day

At long last, having been gone from the crime lab for 13 months, I was finally called to court with no way out of it. My old boss, an awesome guy, would talk to prosecutors and get me out if a defendant didn't plea. Not this time. I slowly got ready this morning, hoping that I would get the call from the prosecutor's office that the defendant took a last minute plea, but no luck. Went up to the crime lab to pick up the case file, said hey to some old friends/co-workers, etc. I really do miss some of those people. I miss the work too. Not that I don't like what I'm doing now; it's fine. But I would probably have to give the edge to being a forensic chemist. Things are looking better for chemists these days, it seems. The state pay grade for them is going up, the legislature gave the lab more money for working hard on the backlog, and merit raises are being introduced.

I made a light-hearted comment that if they could pay me a certain amount (a little more than what I was making when I left), I could come back and still be able to pay my bills. I'd keep teaching, though, since I'm mainly doing online courses now (which also mean less time at school after work). Just wouldn't be the director anymore. I liked it well enough when I was doing both before. I think I could easily teach 5 classes a year, which combined with what I said I'd need from them, would move me laterally, thus maintaining my current living standards.

Okay so by now maybe you sense that it's more than just an off-the-cuff conversation. He said he'd look into it because they need to hire. Not trying to get my hopes up; it was a higher number than they start out. But I'm not gonna lie...I really enjoyed working in forensics. What drove me away were some coworker issues and the politics of being in a government job. Having been a supervisor for a year now--not to mention my own personal growth in the past year--I must say that some things that could get under my skin and make me have a bad day are just now what I would call "non-essentials." Not worth getting worked up about. The politics of moving up....well, I see my old boss doing it and I feel like, if given the opportunity again, I could follow in his footsteps. I could easily see him moving up and me filling what he just vacated.

As I drove to and from court today, my thoughts dwelled a little time (probably should have been more) on the way God directs the career aspect of our lives. On the one hand, God could want a person in a specific job. On the other, the case can be made for it not really mattering what you do, as long as you enjoy it and are His light in the workplace. I lean toward the latter; my job takes care of what I need. Why I'm here is for PPBC. I've said that over and over. So does it really matter which I do, if I'm happy, it takes care of my living, and I act in obedience by loving others in the workplace? Is there more to consider? I don't know. I wish I could say I am in a solid enough place to answer that, but I'm in one of those little droughts we all tend to have, so my "spiritual clarity" (if you will) is a little muddy.

Well, I don't want to make a big deal about this. Sure I would probably go back if he offered it and at what I need. (Cuz it's not a matter of want, but of can't.) But it was just a casual conversation that may amount to nothing, and I suppose I am good with that too. I have a good job and am blessed, and I'll do my best to follow God's lead wherever I go.

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